1. Redefine the Holidays On Your Terms

Your holiday season doesn’t have to look like tradition, movies, or anyone else’s expectations.

Ask yourself:

• What actually nourishes me?

• What drains me?

• What traditions can I release or reinvent?

The holidays belong to you, just as you are.

2. Honor Queer Love & Queer Joy

Queer love is expansive, powerful, and worth celebrating.

Affirm your queer heart by:

• Spending time with people who see you fully

• Creating queer-centered rituals

• Making space for queer joy, even if it didn’t exist in your childhood holidays

Your queerness is not an inconvenience — it’s a gift.

3. Blood Family vs. Chosen Family

Blood Family

Can be loving — or complicated, distant, or harmful. Your emotions around them are valid.

Chosen Family

The people you build your life with.
The ones who offer softness, safety, and unconditional love.

Both are real. Both matter. But one is not more “legitimate” than the other.

4. Build a Boundary Toolkit

Boundaries are acts of self-respect.

Try these scripts:

• “I’m not discussing that.”

• “Please change the subject.”

• “I need a moment to myself.”

• “I won’t be attending this year, but I hope you have a nice holiday.”

Your comfort is more important than tradition.

5. Create an Exit Strategy

If you expect a tough environment, plan ahead.

Consider:

• Your own transportation

• A friend on standby for check-ins

• A time limit for an event

• Permission to leave early without guilt

You deserve safety — emotional and physical.

6. Prepare a Comfort Plan

When things get heavy, having soft landing places helps.

Try:

• A warm drink ritual

• Comfort movies or playlists

• Cozy blankets & easy snacks

• Grounding journaling or voice memos

• Gentle movement or walks

Your nervous system deserves tenderness.

7. Connect in Ways That Feel Manageable

Not all connection is loud or crowded.

Try:

• Video calls or voice notes

• Simple “thinking of you” messages

• Low-pressure meetups

• Time with queer community

• Volunteering or acts of kindness

Small threads of connection can hold us together.

8. Give Yourself Permission to Feel Everything

You don’t need to perform joy.
You don’t need to hide grief.
You don’t need to be “okay” for anyone else.

Let yourself:

• Rest

• Cry

• Laugh

• Be complicated

• Be quiet

• Be joyful

• Be tender

Your emotions are valid — all of them.

9. Celebrate the Small Wins

Healing isn’t always loud.
Sometimes a win is:

• Protecting a boundary

• Asking for support

• Finding a moment of peace

• Choosing yourself

Honor those moments.

10. Remember: This Season Does Not Define You

Whether this holiday feels magical, messy, or something in between, it is just a moment, not your whole story.

A new season is coming.
New warmth.
New community.
New beginnings.

And when The Inclusive Brew opens its doors, we hope it will feel like a place where your whole self — queer, tender, resilient, and real — is always welcome.